Oh the plotlines for such a story are endless. Reality TV has covered it. Sitcoms have tapped into it. Online videos have documented it. People have endured it and some have survived it relatively unscathed. It is the core of humorous stories, the subject of articles warning of what may come, the cause of irreversible hurt and sometimes a peek into the future of the marriage. Demanding, unrepentant temper tantrums, dotted with moments of silent pouting, accented by screaming and name calling. If you are the spouse-to-be and see all this going on – RUN AWAY!
Knowing this is the behaviour of the bride-to-be, why not call off the wedding?
I think it is a good question to ask. I am not a wedding planner, I barely made it through my own without passing out. I am not a marriage counsellor, telling young people that God says no to sex before marriage and your wife says no after marriage appears not to be the best advice for a successful marriage. The fact that I wouldn’t be given the Best Husband in the World award if I was the last man on earth as well as the only judge in the contest should tell you something about my ability to address the topic of marriage. Still, somehow, I feel compelled to make comments on this topic.
Bridezilla is the result of the bride’s lack of submission to the Bridegroom.
I think I just heard a lot of “Amens” competing with a bunch of “say whats?” I told you I wasn’t great at this marriage thing, I’ve already caused a rift one sentence into my comments on this topic. Maybe I should change directions, see if I can salvage this blog post and keep at least a few people visiting my site.
“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. Ephesians 5:31-32 (NIV)
Thank you Paul for writing this, I may be able to salvage this post and keep a few readers after all.
Bridezilla is the result of the bride’s lack of submission to the Bridegroom because bridezilla still wants her own way. Harsh words and maybe not true of some Christ followers and some collectives of Christ followers, but as I observe the church in what we call the developed world I see a lot of bridezilla going on.
Demanding, unrepentant temper tantrums, dotted with moments of silent pouting, accented by screaming and name calling hidden under the self-righteous claim that we are on the side of right. We do it to God, we do it to those in government, we do it to those we disagree with, we do it to our fellow Christ followers and we even do it to our families and friends. We behave like bridezillas trying to get our own way while The Bridegroom offers us the only way, the only truth and the only life that are worth pursuing.
Bridezilla isn’t the pure spotless bride that is waiting for the wedding feast.
We believe that the church is not a building but instead the people who follow Christ. We believe that to follow Christ means to live like Christ lived. We believe that Jesus healed and loved, had compassion and built relationships even with the worst of sinners.
We also tend to believe that to be like Jesus, the bride of Christ needs to be the Jesus that cleared the temple so we make a figurative whip and flip figurative tables trying to clear the things we see as worldly out of the institutions and individuals around us.
To be like Jesus the temple we clear of the things of this world must be ourselves.
We like to rant and rave and even become militant about the injustices and worldliness of the institutions and people around us, but what about the world that has become a part of us. To become the pure spotless bride who invites others to be a part of the pure spotless bride rather than being bridezilla means Christ followers and the collective of Christ followers must clear their own temple.
Bridezilla attacks those around because they are not the way she wants.
Bridezilla isn’t constructive but destructive. Bridezilla isn’t worried about others doing what is right or about doing what is right. Bridezilla just wants to be right and everyone to live as if that is true. She does it to God, to those in government, to those she disagrees with, to her fellow Christ followers and her family.
Demanding, unrepentant temper tantrums, dotted with moments of silent pouting, accented by screaming and name calling. We behave like bridezillas trying to get our own way while The Bridegroom offers us the only way, the only truth and the only life that are worth pursuing.
If you were the spouse-to-be and saw all this going wouldn’t you run away? I would but then I am not The Bridegroom who is patiently and graciously waiting for His pure spotless bride.
It is time the bride submits to The Bridegroom and becomes what He wants her to be.
While the TV program “Bridezillas” has its amusing moments, I tend to find it extremely distressing. To begin with, the program has a voyeuristic quality. In their desire for fame, participants sacrifice all privacy and dignity. Viewers take pleasure in the tantrums and broken relationships. Not only are these couples unready for marriage, they are unready for life. Often their focus is on a “perfect” day, is if the wedding were more important than the marriage, itself.
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amen, my 2nd marriage I called off 3 times before the wedding and went through with it anyway, divorced a year later. Big mistake
Great analogy–and a painful reminder that the Bride of Christ often acts like Bridezilla!
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