There comes a time in every man’s life that he realizes he is no longer what he once was. His hair grows faster and thicker than it once did, unfortunately it has migrated south finding its way from the top of his head to the ears and nose, chest and back and anywhere else that hair once avoided growing in large quantities. His once bulging biceps now swing in the wind as he raises his arms. What were once called triceps continue to wave long after he stops waving. What he once considered physical features of the fairer sex have now become the unfair features of the middle aged man. He has developed breasts and appears to be 6 months pregnant and has acid reflux and a constant need to urinate to match. There is only one way to address this, only one cure for this crisis, get a new mode of transportation.

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