Sometimes it seems that my hurt is too much for God. I know that no theology supports this conclusion. I know that the messages I have heard in no way mirror this idea. I know that the Christians in my life would never propose this as even close to a biblical truth. Still, it seems possible, maybe even true, because sometimes it feels like my pain is too much for God.

It feels, maybe that is the problem.

Can I base my understanding of God on a feeling? Can I proceed with life based on an emotion? Can I conclude with any certainty that a concept based on an idea which is compiled around the way I experience life is in any way proper, correct and biblically based? Do my feelings matter? Do they even belong in the way I perceive life? It feels like my pain is too much for God but should how something feels be part of a Christian’s life?

Too many of us struggle with our feelings.

Too many of us find ourselves trapped by emotion. Too many of us are overwhelmed by our reactions to the hurt we have experienced. We’re Christians. We have Jesus. We have the Creator of the universe in our corner. Why should we let what other sinners do hurt us, the elect, the chosen, the redeemed? Shouldn’t we just get over it? Shouldn’t we just forgive? Doesn’t forgiveness lead to forgetting? Then why does it sometimes feel like my pain is too much for God when it should feel like victory and joy?

It’s time to get on with it.

I’m okay. I’m fine. I am a follower of Christ, what better way to live than to look at those who hurt me through the lens of the clean slate demanded of me by the One who cleaned the slate for me? If it hurts so much, you’re taking it too personally. If it is too personal you are being too worldly. If you can’t forget you are being too… well, something that isn’t good. Your feelings need to be put aside. Pull up your bootstraps. Stand on the word of God, you know the one that says love isn’t a feeling. The one that says forgive and forget. The one that condemns us for hurting. The one that tells us that our feelings don’t matter. You know 1 Doormat 2:14 The ways of the man of God are cold, emotionless and unaffected by those in this world. The true follower of Christ gets over it because they know that they are wicked and deserve more than what has been done to them. The keys to heaven belong to those who live, love, and embrace life without feelings, emotions or hurt. There will be no more tears in heaven therefore there is not crying on earth.

When it hurts too much for God…

… you might have believed too much of the lies of Satan. Emotion is a gift from God. Feelings are the way we live life to it’s fullest. God created us to fully experience every moment but too often we are told that feelings don’t matter. It hurts too much for God because we can’t imagine a God who cares so much about how we feel. In a desperate attempt to ensure that feelings are not the basis of our faith many have taught a gospel void of experience, a Christ following life that ignores hurt and a lifeless existence that demands stoic emotionless false fronts to prove we are truly living as disciples of Jesus.

Have you ever hurt so bad it seems too much for God?

I believe we all have, but for most of us who have grown up in the church, especially churches that teach against our more charismatic brothers and sisters, we have been told that what we feel is irrelevant. Worse still, some of us have been told this by the very people that have hurt us. We live in turmoil. The One we need most in the midst of our hurt, is the One we are told is not interested in how we feel. Not only is He not interested in how we feel but, if we are true believers, we wouldn’t feel this way because we would forgive and forget, we would have moved on, we would be fine with whatever happens.

To feel is to experience God.

Creating doctrine based on our feelings is full of pitfalls that will eventually lead to worldly living. If feeling good and avoiding feeling bad becomes the basis for how we live, Satan becomes our master. Still, this is no reason to live life afraid of feeling. Allowing ourselves to feel, to experience the fullness of each moment even when it can hurt so bad is full of opportunities to experience God and others the way God created us to experience Him and His creation.

It is risky! You may get hurt. Sorry, let me take that back. You will get hurt. Not only will you get hurt but you will have to struggle with that hurt. You will have to take the deepest of pain and place it at the feet of God. You will have to get up every day and choose to take on more of life knowing that it can wound you deeply. You can cope the way many have been taught by making God’s gift of feeling a curse to be overcome or you can embrace life and everything it has including feelings knowing that it only hurts too much for God when we choose to keep what we feel away from ourselves and away from Him.

To chose to not feel does the complete opposite. The more we live life without allowing ourselves to feel, the more deeply we feel. The more deeply we feel without recognizing that we indeed feel, the further away we get from the One who not only gave us those feelings but also knows how to best walk with us through them. The angriest of people are often people who has chosen not to feel because someone told them that their feelings are irrelevant and ended up feeling more than they ever wanted to feel!

Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Psalm 61:1-2 (NIV)